Saturday, December 26, 2009

YUM. (6WS)

Ah, the day after Chistmas. Much better than the day after Thanksgiving, yet not as awesome as the day after Halloween. My six words:



All they know is I <3 chocolate.
(See how I stick signs in? Not technically words. :) )

Not that gifts really matter, but my Ghiradeli stash is stocked until March for now. Ooooh, and I got new fuzzy socks. Feet are warm, this is good. (I have such abnormally cold feet, I need the fuzzies....) On an unusual occasion, I have nothing to complain about. I'm bummed all our decorations are down already (upon my brother's request.), though. The Cheer is gone. :( It's almost like postpartum depression, building up to something and then it's like, "Oh shit. Now it's over. NOW what am I going to do?" (Yes, I'm comparing lack of Christmas to mental disease. And presumably, Christmas to babies. Have I creeped you out today? My work here is done.)

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Snow and 6WS!

I haven't done 6WS in a loooong time; since I'm doing practically nothing at the moment, I figured I would do something bloggily-productive. Get on with it, you say? Yes, I believe I should:



**My six**


Snow, cinnamon roll, pajamas. Life = good.
(Just discovered "Compose" tab. Yay me.)

As for what I'm currently doing, just eating dangerously near the keyboard, typing this little post, and listening/watching the Weather Channel. I like hearing about all the snow we're going to get in the coming week (they predict a WHITE CHRISTMAS!! Woot!) and during the local-on-the-8s part they play instrumental Christmas carols. (the Charlie Brown music a few minutes ago. :) )

Good background music for blogging. Even though I'm kind of indifferent to the whole religious message of most of them, the music is really very pretty. I love "Joy to the World."



FIPOGI!







Never eat the pink snow, kiddies...

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Inherently funny words

(I apologize in advance for the load of random crap this blog is, sometimes I feel bad for having not blogged in a while so I stop ignoring the blog post ideas in my head that are random utter crap. Also, I really have to stop rambling on like this to increase word count. Nanowrimo has not left my consciousness yet)

Wikipedia (all knowing god of teh interwebz) has a whole article devoted to the phonosemantics and use of "inherently funny words". Very interestiiiing... Apparently even people who don't speak English can appreciate the random funniness of words. For some reason I felt the need to blog about this, (but really, isn't that ALL blogging stems from?) and why not, anyway? Try not to laugh at any of the following: (question: does this only work verbally? The inherent LAWLability of words isn't mentioned when the words are typed...so consider whether you laugh or not to be part of some sort of scientific test!)

Weasel
Pumpernickel
Spork
Haberdashery
Fribble
Uvula
Zymurgy
Persnickety
Gobsmacked
Flabbergasted
Nipperkin
Giblets
Hornswoggle

(You have any better ones? Long, uncommon funny ones are always great to slip into a conversation. I could have looked a lot of those up, but this was off the top of my head. KUMQUAT!)

Hot Chocolate Season...

My complete love affair with chocolate just grows so much stronger when it's cold out. "Oh, it's cold and gray and disgusting out today. I fancy something warm that is sweet and has the ability to CHEER and is also somewhat festive..." BAM. It's hot chocolate time. Hot chocolate has its own particular season, it can't be consumed any time of the year okay, so it's not a *law*, but really. Drink it all year 'round and it's not special anymore. It doesn't signify anything. Plus, in summer who wants to drink something that's HOT? Yes, people drink coffee/tea... but that disproves my point so I'm not going to mention it. :P Summer is Popsicle season. Other *laws* of hot chocolate:

-- No matter what the stupid package says, don't add water. Never. It makes it watery. (Captain ObviousPants saves the day once again!) Add milk, it's better that way.

-- The kind with the marshmallows already mixed in is pretty much crap. They don't puff at all, so it's like drinking teeth or something. Regular marshmallows dissolve into goo after a while, but that's what they're for!

Overall: hot chocolate rocks. I think that's something we can all agree on regardless of religion/wintry holiday. Winter = hot chocolate! And now, something I've been too lazy to fiddle around with my Mac to get it to do... (i.e Copy & Paste)

FIPOGI!



Now let's play, "Pick the most disturbing thing about the picture!" The meaning of the word "unintentional" when applied to small children? The fact that this is supposed to be a toy? The fake turd? You choose.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Hello again, blogosphere!

18 days and 14,000-ish words later I am BAAAAAAACKKKK! Yaaaaaaaay! *happy dance partay time*

Hmrpf.

Well that is slightly depressing.

I've come back to discover I really have nothing to blog about.

Just wanted to let you know that NAtional NOvel WRIting MOnth did not kill me. (I've never written out the whole thing; knowing this was the last time I thought I should give it its formal goodbye... good riddance. :P) Other than that, nada es interesante en mi vida hoy. (random Spanish interlude, thought there is probably a grammar error in there somewhere. Mostly I know how to swear/recognize when I am being sworn at in multiple different languages. The Germans have quite a way of insulting people, it is SO lovely...)

Otherly other than that, I am congratulating myself on repressing the urge to blurt "NO ONE EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!!!!!" during an exam on that particular subject earlier. "World Studies" is *so* boring-- things like that must be done to maintain sanity. I definitely will never be able to take the Spanish Inquisition seriously. Due to of course:



and...



Ah, mass murder and showtunes. Two of my favorite things!


Saturday, November 14, 2009

Background Change! (and 6WS)

Like it?

Yes? No? HAH. Doesn't matter if you do, I do. I figured it was time for a change, though I did really love the blinged out one. But y'know, season of peace and giving.... and I like the blue.


It's also Six Word Saturday, so here goes:

Weather disappointing, stuck in mid-fall limbo.
(No leaves left, no snow either.)

I'd really be happier if the weather just made up its mind. Not to say I LOVE winter, but it's better than FOG. And wind. Bleh. (Why is spellcheck telling me "bleh" is not a word? Is too. It's a perfectly good all-purpose interjection and/or expression of pre-winterness blahs. Oh, but "winterness" is a word? Wait, it's not when I put it in quotes? HMMMM?! This spellcheck is weird but I'm weirder for arguing with it. BLEH!)

Anyway, I think I found out how to copy & paste with this mouse now that "secondary click" is enabled... now let's pilfer something from Google...



IT'S ALIIIIIIIIVVVVVE!!!!!!

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Now for the REAL holiday!

Happy Veteran's Day!

Meh, not really a happy occasion, but what else is there to say? Not enough people actually celebrate and honor veterans or whatever is supposed to happen thanks to this holiday. Just gives SOME lucky ducks a day off. Not us. :P

I don't have much more to say except didjaknow that they call it Remembrance Day in Canada? I didn't until today... I think this difference originates from the fact that Americans no like the big words. "Veteran's" is just shorter and more obvious. Remember who? Or what? Can I remember my dead goldfish? Hmmm.... goldfish. Cheeeeese. I'm hungry. Am I remembering my memories or the person/thing/fish/imaginary friend itself? Too complicated. Let's stick with "Veteran's", shall we?

(My remembrance of past Veteran's Days: When I was little I didn't know the difference between a veteran and a veterinarian. (it made perfect sense. Dogs = awesome therefore, Dog doctors = awesomer. Don't remember when I learned it wasn't, but I was mad about that. When IS Veterinarian's Day, anyway? *checks* Oh, it passed already. April 25th, incase you didn't know.)

(absence of the recent FIPOGIs is because this weird buttonless Mac mouse doesn't have right-click, so I can't figure out how to get the copy&paste menu for URL's and such. Either I'm completely oblivious/stupid/technologically incompetent/monkeybrained/weird/too cool for dat *choose one*, or I sense a very angry letter to Apple in the future...

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

World's Greatest Excuses, Part 1

Part One of a series of excuses that work for just about everything:

*** But it's a holiday! ***

...and before you think I typed this post meaning for it to be a draft and publish it tomorrow but instead posted it on accident today-- and I HAVE done that before-- NO. In my eyes it's a holiday. Not just Area Code Day, either. Have you seen Google today? Sesame Street, people! Sesame Street is 40. This constitutes a holiday. THIS is why I haven't been Nanowrimo-ing as frequently as I should. I have an excuse. I'm doing other important things. This may be the one instance I'm not just solely thinking up excuses to not feel guilty about my (lack of) novel. I'm honoring Sesame Street and all it stands for. A further, longer, great explanation of this can be found at The Mindset (shout out! Woop!)

It's hard to explain, but the Muppet fandom is probably the best fandom in the world. I'm part of it and I'm proud. Happy birthday to the happiest street in the universe.

Monday, November 2, 2009

NaNo Note

I've news!

I love using Olde English-y expressions, but THAT is not the news! Newsy items:

1. I got a MAC!!!! (thank ye gods! Windows no more! A computer I don't have to share with people who don't spill coffee and other *mysteeeerious* substances upon it...) The Mac no can haz the Internet yet, but its existence is quite promising.

2. I'm doing NaNoWriMo! Basic facts:
a. I have a month to write a novel.
b. That month is November.
c. I'm almost 900 words in and it's the second day,
d. BUT the average words per day *should* be something like 1,667. Nowhere near there, but I digress. This is strictly for fun, anyhow. **side: HUGE oxymoron. How can something be strict and fun?** It's impossible to write a good first draft, much less in 30 days. There's always revision.

IMPORTANT for blog-reading people:

e. This leaves a lot less time to devote to either of the blogs; this one will most likely be grossly neglected first. Unless you want to hear about NaNo every day. I doubt it, I'm the one writing it and it's not that interesting...

*insert funny picture of choice here* Whoop. See? I'm already getting lazy... :l

Saturday, October 31, 2009

To be continued; is being continued (updated-ish)

My Spooky Six Words:

Festivities haven't begun, trickier than treating.
(A change is possible, stay tuned...)

I've been up since 5. MY Halloween is nearly over. Now begins the phase wherein I subject to other peoples' ideas of that today is. (Somewhat willingly, believe it or not.)

That's why I like Halloween though. There's some religious connotation and history, which is interesting, but it's also a chance to run around like a little kid at night and get either candy or the living shit scared out of you. Some people ignore it, but with less of the whole "I don't celebrate ____ and therefore it is evil!" mentality.

*to be updated either late at night or Sunday, a Sunday post will signify a better night than the former...* WRONG. Okay, so I didn't. Suuuugggggaaaarrr comaaaa... karma is a bitch. I also have a cold. (again. PFFFFT....)

NOTE: If you are not happy with my 2 sets of SSW's (I counted the parentheses), the title also counts, and is nicely applicable to a lot of things.



(Oh yeah, there's a button. I think I'll be 31st this week. Coinkydink?)

Friday, October 30, 2009

Blasphemous statements from a teenage girl

Shopping
Is
HELL.

Make it stop... brain melting... no costume... fuck you procrastination, you ruin my life and make my mother a bitch about things that should be solely MY problem, and ARE, because I wreck my own chances at having fun and having a social life and other normal things. I would rather stay in this chair being a vampire and blogging and yapping about my Muppet obsession.

I am incapable of having "fun". That's it. I genetically cannot have "fun". "Normal fun", that consists of shopping and sleepovers and interacting with people and shit like that. My idea of fun is a day spent at Borders or Half Price Books... I'm not picky as long as it involves quiet, inanimate objects. Or television. At this point, my ideal day tomorrow would be:

Watching Young Frankenstein until I have the dialogue completely memorized. (Real scary movies I can't deal with, plus it's awesome. Make that any Mel Brooks/Gene Wilder movie, but hey I have to do *something* "festive")

Eating Hershey's bars.

Not thinking about my Spanish project that's due Monday. (fuck I just thought about it... lalalalalalala, Monday is not 2 days from nowwwww...)

Thank you for listening to me rant, and have a nice day! /sarcasm

FIPOGI:


Merry Christmas on top of it all! :D

*Postscript note: I *may* be a bit more optimistic tomorrow, which I will begin at 6:30 am (come ON, AMC, six thirty in the morning? Oh well.) by watching above mentioned possible-best-movie-of-the-twentieth-century-in-*my*-humble-opinion. And posting my
Spooky Six Words, as everyone should. That'll cheer me up, I suppose. Meh, today I feel like shit anywho. This should be fun, but I'm pissed at myself for the most part for not "trying" to have fun more. Oh, and ignore the quotes. I do that a lot when I don't edit.*

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

I live with a bunch of 4 year olds. (I'm one)

**I'll just let this conversation speak for itself**

Me: *staring at my mother with her bra wrapped around her head* "Exactly WHAT are you doing?"
(nearly 50something) Mother: *pause* "Plaaaaayyyying." :D
Me: *dead stare*
Mom: "Trying out halloween costumes?"
Me: "And WHAT are you?"
Mom: "The Fly." *pause* "A condom?"
Me: *what the fuck-type face* *hysterical laughter*

Oh, and this phone call with my dad.

Me: Hey/'sup type greeting... actual dialogue not remembered until this:
Dad: "I lost my ice cream."
Me: "...how?"
Dad: "I was trying to pick of the chocolate. I don't like chocolate. Then it fell off the stick!"
Me: "Hah. Sucks for you."
Dad: *whiny* "But now I doooooon't have iiiiice cream!"
Me: *laughter*

I like to pretend I'm the only "adult" in these situations... but I'm really not. It's how we "are" and it's cool. My friends with crazy-strict parents want to live here. The grass is always greener and crap like that... It probably didn't help that it was my brother's birthday and we were all sugar high. Teeheeh... >.>

If it turns out I can't write fiction for beans (we'll find out next month I 'spose. Woot NaNoWriMo!) I'll go the route of David Sedaris (love him) and write about all this. That's what this blog will become periodically, just my life, no real witty observations or whatever it is that draws you here. It helps that my life is funny when I'm not.

FIPOGI!



*Filed under category: Captain McObviousPants*

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Six Word Saturday!

Long time since I've done this. I missed it. My six:

Week of AGGGGHHLSIWSKLGOIBMWSOPPPPPPTTTT!!!@!#$*&!fmmmblat over!!! (Need sleep.)

Yes, "AGGGGHHLSIWSKLGOIBMWSOPPPPPPTTTT!!!@!#$*&!fmmmblat" is a word. A word to conveys the sounds of my brain melting, followed by an explosion, and more angry muttering. Hooray for Saturday.

Button button button!


(click it for more-- hopefully more eloquent-ish-- 6WSes.)

FPOGI!



I pick the third thing Google throws me when I'm bored/indecisive. For simply, "funny", Google Images put this third. In case ya wanted to know.

Postscript bit: After observing the cat picture, I have a question. What type of fruit is that? I'd say lime, but isn't the cat's head too big for that? Or is it a huge lime? Watermelon maybe? Watermelons are stripy. Can't be an avocado.... ah, the mysteries of life...

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

50th post of spectacularity!!! (or not.)

A whole week and no blog. It's feels weird to finally be doing this, but here are my 7 awardees:


(But first, the icon!)

It Ain't Easy Being Cheesy
Show My Face
Sparkle's Soup of the Day
Life's a Beach
Gay Guy/Straight Guy
According to Alex

Just a bit of shameless promotion, really

Congratulations all. If you don't accept awards or something, disregard this. If you do, wave it proudly somewhere. (and if you do, pass it on to 7 other people and post 7 things people don't know about you. Like I have.)

FIPOGI:



I am to love the Engrish language...

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Part 1 & 23/30

The Whiny Edition.

Mehhhhh...

I've barely been able to read blogs lately, let alone post them. My Internet is full of suck, I still can't choose the 7 victims (which ones have it, I'm checking... which ones accept awards, who will hate me most if I don't... stuff like that. ;) ) I'm going to bestow the icon upon. I can't stop rhyming or using Victorian English terms, and I have-- eh, don't know what it is, it's *just* severe enough to make me whiny and neglectful of the ninternet. (I'm keeping the typo, it's a new word. The Internet for NINNIES!)

Suffice to say I'm cranky and I feel like crap. *goes to Symptom Checker* *yeah, they have one. Quite a few. WedMD is good. It thinks I have a cold. Awww darn. I was shooting for "Dust exposure". :(*

FIPOGI!



Teehee! >:-)

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Today's blog comes in two parts.

This is just the 7 facts. I'll get to the 7 people tomorrow.

Or maybe Monday.

Pinkie swear.

Anywhooo....

1. I'm a lefty! Whoop! (As are Al Gore, Marilyn Monroe, Mark Twain, Oprah, and Jim Henson.)
2. Cereal in milk grosses me out. Cereal = fine. Milk = fine. Together? NASTY.
3. I collect key chains. (Yet I have no keys for fear of losing them.)
4. I lose things a lot. (See above)
5. I love the smell of books.
6. I hate Jenny McCarthy. (I've said this before but never explained... my brother has autism, so I've heard of her theories. It's bullshit. I hate that she tries to get other people to "cure" their children instead of accepting them as the great kids they are! STFU!

Ahem. Sorry to get preachy.)
7. I'm a huge Muppet fan. **See #1. All Muppets* are operated as being left-handed too** (I also live here. Internet-wise.

BONUS: 8. For people who don't read this blog much, to avoid confusion... Rena isn't my "real" name, but rather a name made for the Nerdfighters community. Dr Rena backwards is "A nerrd." **Pay no attention to the extra R, "Dr. Ena" just doesn't have the same ring to it.**

It's really Renata, which people tend to mispronounce. Ree-nah-tah. Comprende?

Interesting, no? No? Alrighty then.

FIPOGI!

(Or rather, FIPOGI's new cousin, FIVOGI! Watch the video!)



I love the song, (Moreso than anything "current"... 70s-80s too.) but I LOVE a good parody. Expect more of these when I get lazy and don't want to spend 20 minutes on Google Images!)

*Footnote: Spellcheck seems to think that "Muppet" is a word, but "Muppets" isn't. Learn to pluralize, spellcheck! Muppets!

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

ALMIGHTY PROCRASTINATOR(ator!)

I COULD say I'm still carefully considering who I'm going to choose and what seven juicy personal secrets I'm willing to reveal to you all. Instead of all that, (including an intricate lie involving a clown car and latex gloves... let's not go there.) I'm going to spare you the BS (and spare myself the burden of thinking up said BS. Currently I lack the mental capacity required to do so and THAT says quite a lot.) and tell you openly that, hello, my name is Rena and I'm a chronic procrastinator. (But hey, any title ending in "ator" is cool, right? PROCRASTINATOR. Yeah. EVERYTHING LOOKS AWESOME IN CAPZ, LYK YA?)

But to make up for it, here's a joke:

How do you find paper cuts you didn't know you had?
Pour hand sanitizer ALL OVER YOUR HAND! :D

......



Oh, wait.

That's not a joke. That's horrible horrible PAIN!!! O THE BURNING STINGING PAAAAIIIINNN! **I get them confused easily**




(let's just add this one to the list of lessons learned the hard way...)

FIPOGI! (this is also my most caps-TASTIC blog to date. Aren't you glad you're reading it?)



A REAL joke:

What are the two dirtiest animals on the farm




BROWN CHICKEN BROWN COW.

(yeah, it's an old joke. But it has a *real* punchline!)

Sunday, October 4, 2009

OMGOSH YAY... zzzzz...

Woooo!

I got an award! *points*



From Angel, who I happen to know got it from Raven (I read them both, check them out! :) ) and right now I'm just too tired to contemplate who I'll give this to and who I'll cruelly deny this awesome award. (People who've already gotten it, but deserve it nonetheless... *points to loooooong bloglist*) I've been drawing the Spaniards and the Aztecs stabbing each other for the past 2 hours, which is painstaking and terrible because I cannot draw for beans. I've accepted this and moved on. I feel really bad about this, though because it's one of these "alternative tests" where there's no test but a partner-project thing weighted as a test grade. So, my suckass drawings will bring down the poor girl I got partnered with. Sorry.

Anyhow, I'm tired and my wrist is crampy and I have to go back to drawing statues made out of blood and bread and the hearts of the hot warrior guys. Pobre chicos guapos. :(

I'll edit this tomorrow when I've had time to think, but I wanted to let you cyberpeople know I got an AWARD!!! Yay.

*crawls sadly back to desk... gets distracted by Tetris.*

Friday, October 2, 2009

Dear So & So: Train of MADNESS

It's been a while since I've done this, so let's get on with it:

Dear So and So...

Dear Trains:

WHAT do you have against us?

Every. Single. Friggin. Friday. At least 3 freight trains. Today it was five. Half an hour sitting on a bus with around 70 homecoming-crazed students and no open windows. I had to pee on top of all that. TORTURE.

-- Rena

Dear Allthathomecomingcrap:

Hmm. I guess I owe you an apology. The "pep rally" was actually fun. More screaming than pep, but fun nonetheless. Much dancing. You stole the "football players doing the Single Ladies dance" thing from Glee. Plagiarists. I don't care anymore. It was so tacky it was funny. As was the Thriller dance. That was pretty darn awesome. Needed better costumes. Why the sentence fragments?

Dear Brits,

I loveyouIhateyouIloveyouIhateyou I LOVE YOU.

Ye, who hath invented Fish & Chips, and talking liketh this. Because of your delicious fried concoction, I hath burned my tongue so severely I can barely chew. Yes, I zealously stuck an entire "chip" into my mouth seconds after coming out of hot oil, but responsibility for your own *stupid* actions is so un-American. Always blame someone else. In this case, that's you. Sorry, delicious people.

Lovingly, painfully,
Rena

Dear blog,

Sorry for neglecting you. Currently I'm seriously distracted. I should go to bed or do something productive. Oh well. Forming odd short sentences. Whoooooo!

FIPOGI!



(I love Photoshop. Or whoever made this. Or the trainer of this cat.)

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Decade-based thoughts

Sorry I haven't posted in a while! Life got in the way. (Yup, I have one, as nonexistent as it seems...)

Homecoming Week is pretty much useless, but Pajama Day (Monday, thank god, the day we all want to.) was bliss. I am NOT a Monday morning person, nor will I ever pretend to be. PJ pants FTW. Yesterday was just class colors day, we were pink. Fine. Except that I don't OWN much pink clothing. *dodges rocks*



If it was THIS, I wouldn't mind.

Anyway. The only other good thing about all this Spirit crap is that the entire week classes are notoriously NOT HARD. That's what I was told. But nooooo. Papers due Friday, major projects I really shouldn't be procrastinating on... due soon-ish. It's not more than would be in a normal week, but I was off guard to all this. Who doesn't like doing nothing? The "having to do stuff" part of doing nothing is what sucks.

Tomorrow is decades day-- I'm dressing like a punk, (aka raiding my mom's closet; she never throws *non totally disgusting* clothes away because "They'll be back in style someday", which is the worst excuse of all time according to Stacy & Clinton.) But that should be fun. I wonder what my life would be like if I was this age in the 70s or something... Seems like an interesting time period. But what isn't? There was always stuff happening, even if it's not "interesting". I'd still be addicted to television, that much I know. No Internet, but it's not like I'd know there COULD be an Internet at that point so I'd be fine.

Oh well. At least we get out early on Friday. :)

FIPOGI!



:D

Sunday, September 27, 2009

After a LONG while...

I'm just catching up on all your comments, blog followers. You people rock.
(And commenting on all the other blogs I wasn't able to see/comment on, because Blogger "conveniently" decided to stop remembering me, (I always do that, even though I really should sign out for fear of teh HACKERS. :O Even almost no one else uses this computer...) and I couldn't re-login because my password contains an s, which I couldn't use, AND I couldn't make the @ sign to type my gmail name. Suckish.)

Annnyyywwwhhooo...

Thought you should know. This length of non-blogging is likely to cause concern amongst my *huge* fan base.

(And I'm going to update my bloglist again soon. I always check out my followers blogs, and they're pretty awesome. Also thinking about a background change... going to be a major makeover soon, actually. All I've really added to the sides is the quote widget, which I may move up, I don't know yet. And my profile could use some work, I like the random questions Blogger comes up with... ramble, ramble, ramble...)

FIPOGI!!!



**This isn't funny so much as it is AWESOME**

Friday, September 25, 2009

I got my vvizh.

**In an effort to make this more readable, the double u vvil be represented by double v. Or one if I get lazy. German accent FTVV. And letter 21 of the alphabet vvil be the gangsta version, the z. It'll be hard to remember to convert all those letters to the alternative, but for you all I'll sacrifice.** (Spellcheck corrects it most of the time, actually. I just have to type it like this the first time to get it to recognize it...)

Today haz been really icky. Ortho early in the morning = MASSIVE HEADACHE rest of the day. Avvful. The best I can describe it iz that feeling you get when you chevv gum for VAY TOO LONG and your javv starts to hurt, then your head and it kinda gets all throbby? Yeah, that. Only you can NEVER 5TOP CHEVVING THE GUM. Imagine the pain. I couldn't go home, 'cuz the nurse iz an azzhole, and I had 3 tests today, vich iz unfair 'cuz I couldn't concentrate on anything... (but I digress, this post haz a happy ending...) 5o I spent the last 2 hours zleeping, (INCLUDING on the bus 'o doom which zayz a LOT, because I HATE IT, and I can almost never sleep on anything that move.) and when I woke up it vaz POURING!!!! The GOOD kind of rain. Instantly made me happier.

(I'm not doing Dear Zo & Zo, although I can think of a fevv novv:

Dear rain and chocolate and sleep:
Luv ya lots,
Me.

Dr. Orthodontodude--

You suck.)

This iz a zhort post, mostly cuz I hate typing like this, I'm not a gangsta and I knovv it. Fo zhizzle.

FIPOGI!!!!



Be sure to put that in the vil before you touch the wires of INSTANT DEATH... moohaha.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

No Edits!

So, I didn't wind up editing the 6:00 am blog from yesterday. Ah well.

Y'know what annoys me? People who mispronounce "especially" as "EXpeshully". Urgh!!! That level of butchering done to the English language should not see the outside of a computer. Period.

Thing 2: I love Thursday. Don't know why, but it seems like the week is over without being OVER. Usually it FEELS like Friday, so then Friday comes and that's just this extra day that separates Thursday (psuedo-Friday) from the actual awesome that is Saturday. This Saturday won't be as awesome, though. Closet cleaning FTL. I know I have to, I'd really kind of LIKE a cleaner closet, *I* just don't wanna. I'm a lazy neatfreak. I like when things are clean and in order, but yet I put no effort into keeping them that way. Contradictory, but true. My life in approximately 3 words.

When is it finally going to start being fall-ish? GAH. It's been cloudy over here for the past week. Either RAIN, or GO AWAY. Stupid clouds. I hate this inbetween thing. It's GRAY and that's it. Rain is anticipated, but it never comes. I love rain, when it's dark and cold and it pours. That is a day for reading and hot chocolate. Humid gray pre-drizzling is awful.

Oh darn. No the key in't orking. Dammit. Neither i the "dubya" (I HATE that pronounciation, but jut o you get the idea...) Tupid ticking key(pluralization)!!! AARGH!!!!

At least (WHAT? NOW they work? Not gonna fix all that. I guess it proves all you have to do is yell at them sometimes. ork on everything.

damn you bipolar keys (another s! WTH?) DECIDE! Work or not? What will you do in this next sentence?

**Before it cre itelf again... DAMMIT!**

FIPOGI!



Jut in time for creeper eaon!
(I love the candy, though. It' an ecue to act like a kid and get candy. HOLIDAY(plural) PN.)

**Comical mipelling and rant left in on purpoe. Orry if you can't read it! :)**

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Early Bird Gets WHAT?

It's 6:46 am, Central Standard time. I have to leave to get my ass to a bus stop in 4 minutes. There are already 5 new blogs up, one from Cate --> *points, no time for linkage* posted 2 minutes ago, so my reading list says. I may just post this now and edit it in the afternoon.

Ah well. Incompletely posted blog ending now-- 6:48.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

RTT the First (A list)

**Since it's what all the cool people are doing**
**And I need a Tuesday meme to provoke thoughts**
**But what day ISN'T a RT day?**
**Oh well.**

It's Random Thought Tuesday!
*Err... Random Tuesday Thoughts...*
randomtuesday

This is going to be my everyday Random Thoughts, only less elaborated upon, in a more run-on bullet points format. Some of these won't even make sense to those not in my brain. Or even to me. It's doubtful that I'll spellcheck this. It's one of *those* days.

-- I kind of hate fall. Autumn is better.
-- Jenny McCarthy never ceases to annoy the crap out of me.
-- I wish it was Thursday.
-- The only good thing about Homecoming week is pajama day.
-- ET still scares me shitless.
-- Lemon poppyseed muffins are awesome.
-- I like knowing things other people don't.
-- I'm a wannabe optimist.
-- Quizzical is a funny word.
-- Garbage cans can be sources of vital information. And puns.
-- My morbid sense of humor is deeply repressed.
-- Quotes can say things better than people can.
-- Chuck E. Cheese is the breeding ground for the Assholes of Tomorrow. I used to think that place was awesome, and now I feel bad for people dragged there.
-- The German word for nipples is "Brustwarzsen" (breasts + warts. Teehee.)

-- I fully acknowledge that this is chock-full-'o-suck, but I'm in what is technically termed, "a rut." It sucks.



Well, that explains it. I'm in a rut and quite presumably alone. DO NOT WANT!!!!

FIPOGI...



Cyanide and Happiness is possibly my new favorite source of >:D

**Oh, and if the pictures are too big and cut off, it's not my fault, not gonna fix it.**

Monday, September 21, 2009

The blogosphere is a Monday person.

Seriously. Everyone I read posts on Monday. You're trying to make it difficult for me, aren't you? I DESPISE leaving a blog unread on my reading list, I get completely OCD over it. This has something to do with my FIRST!!!1!!1 obsession, I'm sure. I don't like it when a blog has been sitting there without me reading it.

Today, of course, there are TWELVE new blogs. Thanks a lot, cyberspace. **Not that I have anything against reading the blogs themselves, I love you all, really, it's just my OCD and the feeling that I really *should* post on a Monday even though all my posts on Monday will probably be as follows: "Oh, crap. It's Monday. I hate Monday. Anyone who doesn't is not human. Please go submit yourself for a mental test and leave me alone. That is all, have a gReAt DaY!!! >;)"**

So in the future, either expect that or no Monday post. I've warned you before that this isn't an everyday blog. Or an informative/good/interesting/*insert what it is not here. This could be any number of things, including a blog about fencing, or how to kill a zombie using xylophone mallets. If you'd like one of those, I'd suggest you go here.*

FIPOGI!:



Good to know.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Happy Talk Like A Pirate Day!

Yarrrgh. I love useless holidays. It's something to celebrate. This is going to be a really short post. Non-ramblish. Yay.

My six:

Better mood, thanks to lots of chocolate!!!



(I was 64th this week!)

FIPOGI!


:D

Friday, September 18, 2009

Dear So and So: *holyfuckingspazzamatasticAHHH!*

Dear So and So...

***WARNING***
This blog contains: Swearing, ranting, whining, bitching, moaning and the like. I would like to say I've earned the right to these things, seeing as how I've been such a calm, positive person lately, but frankly I just need to do this or I may become irreversibly holyfuckingspazzamatastically insane. You wouldn't want that, now would you? *psychotic glare*

Does the title not say it all?

Alright then:

Dear-- School idiots (Yeah, ALL OF YOU. I think by now this goes without saying. Every Friday, after a week of this shit, I'll rant about my school. Yes, I realize this makes me no better than any wannabe-emo punk asshole who has nothing better to do than complain, specifically about how no one "understands them". But think of it this way, substitute work for as much as I moan about school, and there you have any "normal adult" blog. I realize this isn't "the real world" quite yet, but school is very much a job, just a job that doesn't pay, with questionably good, life skills teaching results. It's just crap that needs to be done. Becoming "smart" is now our only incentive.)

Where was I? Oh, yeah:

the world, Monday, trains, basketballs, gherkin pickles. And anything or anyone else I can't think of. You know who you are.



That one sums it up nicely.

Love,
Me

Dear World,

Okay, okay, sorry. Hopefully I'll be "better" again soon. (Or at least stop using so many "quotes". Yes, I even annoy myself sometimes.)

-- Rena

FIPOGI! (I'm in a twisted sort of mood that constitutes maniacal laughter at inappropriate things. Or nothing. *twitch* *laughterspasm*)

Thursday, September 17, 2009

I concern people!

And booooy is it FUN.

Once again in "guidance", we had to take the dreaded Freshmen Questionnaire. A variation of which we've taken about 4 times. I'd given them all the answers they want to hear, now let's have some fun:

1. What are your hobbies and/or interests?
Blogging, reading, spending all waking hours on the Internet, filling my brain with television.

2. Who are your 3 best friends?
People you don't know...

3. If you could have the "World's Best Job" *their quotes, not mine*, what would it be?
Supreme ruler of the Universe/Renowned Pastry Chef/Exterminator/Mermaid

4. Describe your current family situation.
Functional dysfunction

5. What is your one biggest worry?
Giant hamsters eating my face!

6. What's the biggest difference between middle school and high school?
The staircases.

7. What sports teams/clubs are you going to/have you joined?
Sports! HAH. You make me laugh.

8. What are you best at?
Scaring counselors. Look behind you.

9. Describe yourself in 3 words.
Sarcastic, nerdfightastic, spastic

10. I'm glad I finally decided to...
Stop being serious about questionnaire questions.

11. Where do you see yourself 10 years from now?
See #3

12. What is the biggest challenge facing teenagers today?
Polar bears

13. I am happiest when I am...
Confusing the likes of everyone.

14. What is one goal you hope to accomplish this year?
Inventing a jelly that tastes like peanut butter. Or vice-versa. I'm not picky.

Oh, there were other more school oriented boring questions. (Who's your favorite teacher, blahdiddle...) that I couldn't really mess up, but in general I think I'll be hearing from the social workers soon. They'll psychoanalyze the crap out of those cryptic faked answers. What does the polar bear symbolize? Your desperate cries for attention? Oh, no! Whatever shall we do with this misguided child?

This is what ya get when I'm bored. Now to sit back and watch the results. (This could also really serve as a test to see if whoever reads these is paying the slightest bit of attention. I'm doing them a service! :) )

FIPOGI!



(The question is, who would it burn more? You or the crayfish?)

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

To my...readers.

Wow.

It feels so weird to type that.

People actually READ this now. I some sort of record that 4 people find this blog worth reading. Hmmmm. I think you should know I'm definitely not one of those "post every day for ____ *a year, a month, however long it takes them to do something.* In a way, I think that would be easier. Having a certain thing to do EVERY SINGLE day, and then blogging about the experience. It would be harder to DO that thing everyday, though. Like cook or go eco bit by bit, or follow the literal translation of the bible. (All things people have done, by the way. These are dedicated, if questionably sane, people. I am not in this group, mostly because of the "dedicated enough to do *a variation of* the same thing for X days/weeks/months..." part.

More often, I post when I have some sort of meme-theme (unintentional rhymes are pretty awesome, and I felt the need to point that out.) on which to base my post. (i.e. Dear So & So, 6WS) It helps me not be so... like this. Just disconnected trains of thought, although occasionally I may provoke some thought. (I hope.)

Not *too* often, though. I started this blog for my own entertainment and personal expression. I'm not going to change this format or censor myself now that I know I'm being read. (I'll try. It's not like these were deep innermost secrets anyway, but the "public eye" makes people do things...)

If you're not pissed off by that, and still would like to read my blabberings on, thank you, and I hope you like what you've found.

FIPOGI!



Noooooo! Google: IT KNOWS ALL!

(this is one of those things that *may* piss people off. Oops?)

Saturday, September 12, 2009

A Morning (Nonexistent) Competition Causes Dullness

It's 6WS!!!



Today I thought I would do the complete opposite of LAST week, and try to post first thing in the morning. I wanted to be first on the Mr. Linky list. I'm competitive that way. I have no chance in sports, but when it comes to the prize of being FIRST on the Internet, even though it's obnoxious to say it, I still am "FIRST FIRST FIRST!!!111"... So I have just barely woken up, and already I'm blogging. (Not without reading Cate's blog at least, whereupon I checked said Mr. Linky and found that I will be THIRTY-SEVENTH, if I hurry up and link now.

Without further ado, my six:

Indecision: What to eat for breakfast?

FIPOGI!



Lolcat nerd jokes. Yay!

Think I'm going to go eat now. KTHNXBAI!

Friday, September 11, 2009

Dear So and So: Ball of Awkward... and Comic Debate

Dear America,

Well... this is quite awkward, isn't it?

To be honest I had almost forgotten the date. (no offense, I'm forgetting everything recently. The day, the date, where stairs are, how to spell my last name. Brain fart.) I remember it doing this weird team-building thing in gym-- involving a beach ball and a hula hoop, don't ask-- and I wondered why they hadn't at least done some kind of "moment of silence" thing over the announcements. At first I was pissed at THEM for forgetting or thinking we wouldn't care, I don't know which, but I realized I'm no better. Maybe it's just a case of, "that was then, this is now" but 9/11 really did change US. The country, people's opinions, the way things ARE. Do we accept it? Do we try to move on and pretend nothing happened? It seems cliche to say it changed us for the better, because maybe it did, but mostly not. Things will never be the same, so I guess all we can do is move on, but still remember. Normally I don't even like referring to the country/the population as "we", but I'm partofit too. It's going to be weird when my kids ask me "Where were you on 9/11?", because honestly I don't have a "good" story. A memorable or interesting or even emotional story.

Looking back I swear it was a weekend, because I woke up late and found my dad watching the news. (Something he rarely does, but hey, it's tv, why not?) There was BREAKING NEWS and footage of a burning building. I asked him what was going on and he told me "Some bast... just go get your mom..."

I think eventually it was explained to me, but even then I didn't care that much. I don't remember going to school-- not because I was in shock, but because either school was cancelled or my memory is bad. I didn't care. I didn't get it. I was six, though. I'm not remorseful for not being sad or in the least bit concerned, but know I understand a lot more about what 9/11 meant. Now it just makes everything... awkward.

-- Renata.

Dear So and So...

Dear Gene Wilder/Johnny Depp,

Thanks. Your respective versions of Willy Wonka provided probably the most interesting discussion in "World Studies" all year. I, of course, was on the pro-orange Oompa-Loompa side, as were about 3 other people. The 2005 version is weird and the songs make me want to rip my eyes out, but for a rousing debate there HAS to be opposing sides, I suppose. Apparently these movies are more important than the Neolithic Era. Yep, they are.

-- Amused Fan

Dear World Studies Substitute Whatsyerface:

Thanks for not caring about us yelling about Oompa-Loompas the entire period. Or singing. Or people (particularly me) shouting, "YOU LOSE!!!! GOOD DAY SIR!!!" **side: Case in point. Best quote of the whole movie.** over and over and over. Either you're too lazy to care, or you're awesome. Either way, you sir are indeed awesome.

-- Thankful, nonworking student

FIPOGI!



(As my mom would undoubtedly quip upon seeing this sign, "Is that a threat or a promise?!")

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

I beat the pedo... meter...

Can I just say right now I hate PE. I hate it hate it HATE IT.



Do I make myself clear???? RAWRGH!

I'm an nonathletic, unmotivated, happily and admittedly lazy person. Why can't you just LEAVE ME ALONE? I'm not overweight in the least, and I maintain this weight by blissfully doing nothing. I don't need your so-called "physical education". I educate myself by telling myself that as long as my metabolism is this way I'm not going to worry about it, and when it reverses I'm either going to:

a.) Get lipo
b.) Stop caring
c.) Whine and complain and do nothing, then eventually get lipo.

I do realize none of these is the "right" answer, but oh well.

Anyway, I truly think the pedometer is the most evil man made device on Earth. A RECORD of my not doing anything for 50 minutes? How could you?

But, I have used my superior smartz to "bounce" ever so slightly... over and over and over, while I was supposed to be playing basketball. We needed a minimum of 2500 steps to pass for the day. (yeah, our PE system is on a sort of daily pass/fail basis, instead of using the presidential fitness test scores or whatever...) I got 2589. I really thought I had beaten the technology or something, but I DID really wind up taking all those steps, bouncing or not.

Congratulations, pedometer. You have officially pwned me.

I hate having PE at 7:45 in the morning.

FIPOGI!


Yes. All will be solved if you just wear pants...

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Every DAY?

How can you people DO it?

I know there are people out there who have enough dedication to blog every single day, but I'm not one of them. I'd like to pretend it's because I'm busy doing productive things and out having a life, but this is not the case. I'm just a lazy procrastinator...

A thought: Is there ever a correct usage of "thru"? It just looks so misspelled. Like something McDonald's thought up because "through" was too long to fit on the signs. But I've been seeing it more-- on the Internet especially, but used by otherwise non-chatspeaky people. And if "thru" IS in fact a word, can it be used interchangeably with "through", or are there two separate ways they should be used?

Well, spellcheck says "thru" is wrong. It doesn't even recognize it as a possible spelling of "through". Its suggestions: Thur, thrum, Thu, thou. Weird.

I've run out of things to say, but I want to say more. BUT, I don't want it to seem like I'm just rambling or searching for things to say. Oh this is like rambling, but ARG, now I'm rambling about rambling. The more I type the word rambling the weirder it looks. Rambley, rambley ramble ramble rambling. Hah. Ram-bling.



Well, apparently I'm not the only one who's thought of it.

Oh, that can count as a FPATEOTP, can't it? Well no, since I've typed a considerable amount after the picture instead of a sentence or two. The acronym FPATEOTP isn't very catchy, either. I'll have to fix that... how about:

FIPOGI:

Funny
Image
Pilfered
Off
Google
Images

It's shorter, at least. And it's a combination of vowels and consonants that, while it isn't REALLY a word, it LOOKS like it could be a word. And, it's not already an acronym. Like the WWF.



OR:



Or...



A comical combination of the two...

Well, that's enough FIPOGIs for one blog.

Saturday, September 5, 2009

So Tired, Must Blog. Need Comments.

It's (late on a) 6WS!

Yaaaay.

I am so tired right now, but we've discussed my love of comments, and I seem to only get comments when I Mr. Linky something and/or use a button, It gets people's attention.

*yawny yawny yawn yawn*

Here's my six:


Been there, done that. No easier.

Yay for the button!:



I can haz comments now? Pwease?

Alright, I'll give you this FPATEOTP in return:



I am 3 of those 1 people.

Friday, September 4, 2009

Dear So and So: Repetitive for a reason.

Really, all of my "Dear So and So's" could be so much like this one it is not even funny. It's Friday, dangit. That's just how I feel.


Dear So and So...


But, in an attempt to actually have something of substance to say, I'll think of another...

Dear KGHS (Kelley Green High *or hellish* School)

Oh yes, this was your nickname up until now. But I am announcing to you that you will henceforth be known as the MJWTFHS. The Michael Jackson School of What The F. Sure, you already play MJ songs during passing periods, and as the "announcement" intro. Are you simply doing this to capitalize on the resurgence of MJ's popularity? Even the seniors weren't born until 1991, wherein he was *almost* a certified creeper/weirdo/whatever, but stiiilll notquite. Not legally. Do you think just because he is now dead those of us between the ages of 14-18 now worship him the way your administrators may have when they were "our age"? Hmmm. No.

Nonetheless, I feel the need to be supportive of your name change. It is well deserved at this point, seeing as a HUGE open hallway leading to most of the main staircases was blocked --by a group of seniors campaigning to be "Kings of the Couch", by raising school spirit and whatnot-- trying to do such spirit-raising by beating conga-ish shaped drums and waving a boombox blasting "The Way You Make Me Feel", this being only one of the several applications of the music of Michael Jackson I have noted within the last two weeks. Some suggestions to *truly* dedicate the school to the mission of its namesake...

**NEW** School Colors: Ummm... are sparkles a color??? Yeah. (much better than the KG, I must say...)

Mission Statement: We are committed to breeding individuals capable of producing the genuinely "WTF" moments only previously achieved by THE Michael Jackson.

New Classes Available: Moonwalking-- for Fun and Fitness
Become a Superstar, Wreck Your Career, and Become Famous Again
The Art of WTF
Plastic Surgery: When to Say NO. **not required for those who can pass the exam in advance. Hint: The answer to #1 is "NEVER."**

Mascot: Chimp (again, much improved from Duke, if I must say so myself...)


Sincerely,
Concerned Freshman


Dear Mustachioed/Bearded Men of the World

No offense, there's been a lot of particularly famous ones among you, (Groucho Marx, Einstein, and Billy Mays come to mind quickly...) but y'all creep me out a little. (I only revert to talking Southern when I am sincerely creeped.) Facial hair is just EW. Not only would I imagine it FEELS like a tarantula eating your face, it makes you look... Ick. If perchance I happen to marry one of you, you're shaving it IMMEDIATELY. (I know that's superficial, but if YOU love ME, you'll accept that I'm not going to accept your half-eaten face and sacrifice it in the name of love.)

Lovingly yet still creeped out,
Rena


FPATEOTP!:




Can you spot all the things wrong with this picture? I can. *shudder*

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Mini TV

I love commercials more than I love television.
I was sadder when Billy Mays died than when Michael Jackson did.
I love when commercials have little people in them.

(it's a weird version of Fannee Doolee, but it's true.)

Are any of these statements starting to creep you out a little? Really, I just noticed them myself and I feel like a bit of an awful person. Just watch this and try not to laugh, and THEN decide if I'm terrible:



I mean, I know how this commercial can be seen as "Politically Incorrect", but it's still hilarious. I mean, if the actors aren't offended, why should it be taken off the air? Probably an average of one embittered "little person's" complaint.

Speaking of the Politically Correct way we deal with 2000's remakes... (I wasn't, but that's my train of thought for you.)

My mom and I were discussing the article in the Sun-Times about "new" fall tv shows that are remakes, and one listed was The Electric Company. Her immediate response:

"Why would they even DO that?! It was so good! They should just show it in reruns."

It's true. In my summer state of advanced television viewing, I turned it on once. (there's nothing else on at 11 am, and we've already discussed my love of the Muppets.) From what I can understand, it's completely abandoned the original concept, and remixed the theme song.

One hilarious blurb from the article:

"None of the same segments are repeated, and no alumni have appeared. The original boasted such talents as Rita Moreno, Bill Cosby, Zero Mostel, Joan Rivers, Gene Wilder and Irene Cara."
*I added the bold, cuz that's a little long for a blurb*

And um, why WOULD they?
(adn, in addition to Zero Mostel being, uh, DEAD, I seriously doubt they would allow the image of a turban-wearing evil little person on TV nowadays... It's funny that I'm the one that thought of that and not my mom. ("I was 8. People didn't think like that then.") I mean, I was being sarcastic, like, " That's promoting terrorism! Save the children's little minds!" But I'm sure someone would make a lawsuit of it.

Seriously. Just rerun the old ones, PBS. None of this superheros/aliens/superpowers/organic diner crap. Maybe THAT'S what's keeping the 6 year olds from learning, hmmm?

FPATEOTP!



I hope this time the picture doesn't get cut off on the sides. It's on "small" and "center", but sometimes even that doesn't work. *O crap and a half. Just click on it to get the full effect...*

Sunday, August 30, 2009

Confesssion time!

I stalk mommy blogs.

There, I said it.

I'm not ashamed, but I do aknowledge that this is odd, considering I do NOT have kids. (sorry, Dr. Phil. Quit calling me.)

But I find other people's kids so. Freaking. Adorable! I kind of admire the moms, too. I know and admit from NOW that I could not deal with kids on a daily basis. (Not unless "Shut up and go annoy daddy!" is considered dealing with kids. I think not.) Every parent has these moments/days/weeks, but they manage to put it into cyberspace with HUMOR. Sometimes I can't tell if it's the kids or if these people ARE just really that funny. I salute you all: *link time! I'm so happy I can do HTML now.*

Kat
WhisperingWriter
C. Beth

Special section for the dad bloggers!:
LiteralDan

*dad blogger-to-be*The Quarter Thrower (I didn't enter the pool, I suck at guessing...)

Oh, and if you want to know about what I'M doing now, I'm watching the Daytime Emmys. Yea. Go Sesame Street! (I still love that show, shut up. It's awesome.)

FPATEOTP!:



It's a shirt. I WANT IT.